Sitting on the train gives you a lot of time to think. I found myself contemplating how I felt heading back to Montreal: remorseful, relieved, or happy. I could not settle on one emotion. I was happy to leave behind the drama I had encountered during my moments in Toronto, but sad to leave my friends, family, and the places I loved and knew so well.
The weather had been lovely all week. It was perfect weather for a garden party! My mum threw me a tea party in celebration of my convocation. Many old faces came, some traveling from afar. It was nice to be reminded how much people care for me, amidst the nasty e-mails and silent treatment I was receiving from others at the same time. My mum had gone to great efforts to get all my favourite foods for the party. There were lemon squares from Dufflet, artisan breads from the market, huge slabs of camembert and goat cheese, baklava, and scallops too! Judy even brought Turkish delight! I was in culinary heaven.
Although we popped many corks from bottles of sparkling wine, I lacked the glint as in my glass. Despite the festivities, I still found my thoughts drifting to the drama in Toronto. My friend Natalija comforted me with some of her worldly wisdom, saying that some people will “…unconsciously cut you off because you’re no-longer in the city and they never see you… so they get angry at you for unusual reasons in order to sever all ties.” This made me feel better, but I hope those ties can be sewn back together sometime in the future.
Now I sit on the train, writing. It is 8:06pm and its still sunny out! There is a delicious peachy golden light seeping over the treetops of all the trees we past. It looks like some sort of sugary dessert. We’ve past some of the sweetest farmhouses as well, all in brick or stone. I’ve been admiring the clouds as well. The sky is like a pale blue canvas with dry brush strokes of white paint wisped across it. Its quite lovely. The world is so peaceful and beautiful, sitting on the train.